SOME of you may know that last week Battersea Court was without hot water for 3 days. On the 2nd day I wandered into the kitchen and went to make a cup of Earl Grey tea. Where there used to be 1 kettle there were now 2! I thought that I had double vision, so for a while I banged my head against the oven. After realising that there really were 2 kettles, I bandaged up my head and proceeded to make an express cup of tea. Basically to do this you put half a cup of water in one kettle, half in the other kettle, and switch them on. Hey Prescott! You have an express cup of tea!
  QUIETLY sniffing in the subtle lemony aroma of the Earl, I thought back to my GCSE science days, and wondered whether a 6-month-old kettle would heat water faster than a brand new kettle. So I got the kettles, emptied them out, and then poured exactly 1litre of cold water in. To make sure they each had equal power I took them off the double plug and gave them a wall socket each. The results? Well actually I set them boiling, got bored of waiting and went into my room and missed it… so I did it again and this time I got the results!! The new kettle won by under half a second!
  I finished the cup of tea and then started to think what possibly could happen in order for them to give us another freezer (which is what we really need!). We get an ant infestation, and we get given another fridge. We get legionella in our hot water, and they give us another kettle. Hmmmm…. How about if a miniature volcano erupted from the grass in front of the library!! Due to the extreme heat, that way we're sure to get a freezer!! Right then I'll get digging, but first… a nice cup of tea.

  WE'VE lived through the perils of the killer pharaoh's ants, we've suffered the anxiety of having a Bacardi thief in our midst but last week we at Battersea Rawson unfortunately encountered a slightly more serious problem - our water became infected with Legionella Bacteria, more commonly known to most as the stuff that can cause the dreaded Legionnaire's Disease. On Tuesday night we were informed that our hot water supply was being switched off because of this, and before the serious reason sunk in we were all more worried about smelling than popping our clogs. Neil, however, claimed that this really wouldn't make much of a difference to him, since his weekly shower is on a Friday anyway! However, after a phone call to home, where my mum (ever the calming influence) told me not to worry but that the survival rate if I got ill was about 50%! Luckily we were only without water until the Friday, and so far no one is ill… but if you smelt something bad on campus last week, it was probably someone from Battersea Court!
  LAST night the Rawson Phenomenon reared its rather comical head again. Being in a bit of a rush before heading off to the Union, myself and a friend decided to succumb to the evils of pizzaman once again. After a phone conversation in which the pizza man came out with "Rawson, where is that? Is it on campus?" we settled down to some mindless TV eagerly awaiting our pizza. After about an hour and still no pizza, we decided to give them a ring back and this time we got "I could not find Rawson, where it is? Opposite the launderette? But I do not know where the launderette is!" I am starting to wonder whether Battersea Rawson is actually in some kind of parallel dimension. Perhaps it is really a mirage, only visible to those of us lucky enough to live in this lovely ant and virus infested building. Maybe that's why nobody ever comes to visit us!